Friday, August 16, 2013

fumigating my appetite

Dear Restaurant Staff:

The smell of toxic cleaning products while you mop down the kitchen floor does not enhance the flavor of the food I am trying to enjoy. If your intention is to get patrons to finish their food quickly so that you may close for the night then you have succeeded. This intervention is highly effective. However, I do appreciate you cleaning your floors and hope you don't get any on the kitchen counter or in food.

Sincerely,
Germ Rambler

3 comments:

  1. I tasted cleaning product in my pan pizza once. I have a feeling they didnt rinse it thoroughly enough, and the barrier between the crust and the pan was a mix of industrial cleaner and oil.

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  2. that's horribly disgusting. what did you do?

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  3. I quit eating it and recorded the incident. I waited a week to make sure I didnt go blind, or lose any other of my senses. I'm let it slide because I knew it was clean at least. Sure, eating chemicals wasnt exactly "nice", but it wasnt at all like watching someone Al Bundy someones food then coming to the realization that he probably prepared the taco you're also eating.

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